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Send a friend something kind today
Most kind messages never get sent because the right words don’t come. Here’s one already written. Pick what they’re going through underneath, change any word, then send it while you’re still thinking of them.
What’s going on for them?
How do you want to sound?
And for the days you need the letter yourself
We make Dear You, a private letters app for iPhone. Choose what you need today (encouragement, calm, a fresh start, courage, gratitude or a surprise) and open an original letter written for it. Each one ends with one small step and a question worth writing back to.
- Write a letter to future you and seal it for a week, a month or a year. It stays locked until its day.
- No account, no ads, no analytics. Lock it with Face ID.
- Your first daily letter, two Open When letters and one sealed future letter are free.
What makes an encouraging message land
- Name the thing. “Good luck with the interview” beats “thinking of you”, because it shows you remembered.
- Take the pressure off replying. “No need to answer” is a gift to someone who’s already stretched.
- Skip the silver lining. “Everything happens for a reason” asks them to feel better for your sake. “This is hard and I’m here” doesn’t.
- Offer one specific thing. “Can I drop dinner round on Thursday?” is easier to say yes to than “let me know if you need anything”.
- Send it now. A plain message today does more than a perfect one you never write.
The messages are written by us and generated in your browser. Nothing you type is stored or sent anywhere until you choose to send it yourself. If a friend has told you they’re thinking of harming themselves, a message isn’t enough on its own: stay with them, and contact a crisis line or emergency services together.
Writing to yourself instead? Try the letter for today.
Questions people ask
What do you text a friend who is going through a hard time?
Something short that names what is happening, says you are thinking of them, and does not ask them for anything. Adding that they do not need to reply makes it easier to receive.
What should I not say to someone who is struggling?
Avoid silver linings and comparisons, such as everything happens for a reason or at least it is not worse. They can make people feel they have to cheer up for you.
Is it okay to send encouragement by text?
Yes. A text is easy to read when they are ready, and they can reply in their own time. For grief or serious news, a call or visit afterwards can mean a lot too.
Is my message saved?
No. It is created in your browser and is not stored or sent anywhere unless you send it yourself.
Related
- Open a short letter for todayChoose what you need today: encouragement, calm, courage, a fresh start or gratitude. Open a short, original letter with one small step. Free, nothing stored.
- FutureMe alternativeFutureMe delivers letters to your future self by email. If you want letters that stay private on your iPhone, with no sign-in and a Face ID lock, try Dear You.
- Thanksgiving gratitude card makerWrite a short Thanksgiving thank-you note with three guided prompts, watch the card design itself as you type, then download it or send it from your phone.
- Anniversary Calculator: Days Together, Next Anniversary and Gift Theme (Free Card to Share)Enter the date you got together and see how long it has been in years, months, days and hours, how long until the next anniversary, the traditional gift for that year, and the day milestones coming up. Download a shareable card.